Papa Can You Hear Me: Grieving, Hope, and Hanukkah Miketz 5785

(לו) וַיֹּ֤אמֶר אֲלֵהֶם֙ יַעֲקֹ֣ב אֲבִיהֶ֔ם אֹתִ֖י שִׁכַּלְתֶּ֑ם יוֹסֵ֤ף אֵינֶ֙נּוּ֙ וְשִׁמְע֣וֹן אֵינֶ֔נּוּ וְאֶת־בִּנְיָמִ֣ן תִּקָּ֔חוּ עָלַ֖י הָי֥וּ כֻלָּֽנָה׃ (לז) וַיֹּ֤אמֶר רְאוּבֵן֙ אֶל־אָבִ֣יו לֵאמֹ֔ר אֶת־שְׁנֵ֤י בָנַי֙ תָּמִ֔ית אִם־לֹ֥א אֲבִיאֶ֖נּוּ אֵלֶ֑יךָ תְּנָ֤ה אֹתוֹ֙ עַל־יָדִ֔י וַאֲנִ֖י אֲשִׁיבֶ֥נּוּ אֵלֶֽיךָ׃ (לח) וַיֹּ֕אמֶר לֹֽא־יֵרֵ֥ד בְּנִ֖י עִמָּכֶ֑ם כִּֽי־אָחִ֨יו מֵ֜ת וְה֧וּא לְבַדּ֣וֹ נִשְׁאָ֗ר וּקְרָאָ֤הוּ אָסוֹן֙ בַּדֶּ֙רֶךְ֙ אֲשֶׁ֣ר תֵּֽלְכוּ־בָ֔הּ וְהוֹרַדְתֶּ֧ם אֶת־שֵׂיבָתִ֛י בְּיָג֖וֹן שְׁאֽוֹלָה׃

Genesis 42:36-38

(36) Their father Jacob said to them, “It is always me that you bereave: Joseph is no more and Simeon is no more, and now you would take away Benjamin. These things always happen to me!” (37) Then Reuben said to his father, “You may kill my two sons if I do not bring him back to you. Put him in my care, and I will return him to you.” (38) But he said, “My son must not go down with you, for his brother is dead and he alone is left. If he meets with disaster on the journey you are taking, you will send my white head down to Sheol in grief.”

Yaakov has already experienced the loss of two children, Yosef and Shimon, and so he is giving into his pain of being a שכולה, one who experiences the loss of a child. In the using the word שכלה to describe his anxiety and loss of his children, Yaakov connects his pain to barren and childless women, namely, Rachel.
Rabbanit Atara Lindenbaum

שמואל א ב׳:ה׳-ח׳

(ה) שְׂבֵעִ֤ים בַּלֶּ֙חֶם֙ נִשְׂכָּ֔רוּ וּרְעֵבִ֖ים חָדֵ֑לּוּ עַד־עֲקָרָה֙ יָלְדָ֣ה שִׁבְעָ֔ה וְרַבַּ֥ת בָּנִ֖ים אֻמְלָֽלָה׃ (ו) יְהֹוָ֖ה מֵמִ֣ית וּמְחַיֶּ֑ה מוֹרִ֥יד שְׁא֖וֹל וַיָּֽעַל׃ (ז) יְהֹוָ֖ה מוֹרִ֣ישׁ וּמַעֲשִׁ֑יר מַשְׁפִּ֖יל אַף־מְרוֹמֵֽם׃ (ח) מֵקִ֨ים מֵעָפָ֜ר דָּ֗ל מֵֽאַשְׁפֹּת֙ יָרִ֣ים אֶבְי֔וֹן לְהוֹשִׁיב֙ עִם־נְדִיבִ֔ים וְכִסֵּ֥א כָב֖וֹד יַנְחִלֵ֑ם כִּ֤י לַֽיהֹוָה֙ מְצֻ֣קֵי אֶ֔רֶץ וַיָּ֥שֶׁת עֲלֵיהֶ֖ם תֵּבֵֽל׃

I Samuel 2:5-8

(5) Men once sated must hire out for bread;
Men once hungry hunger no more.
While the barren woman bears seven,
The mother of many is forlorn. (6) The LORD deals death and gives life,
Casts down into Sheol and raises up. (7) The LORD makes poor and makes rich;
God casts down, and also lifts high. (8) God raises the poor from the dust,
Lifts up the needy from the dunghill,
Setting them with nobles,
Granting them seats of honor.
For the pillars of the earth are the LORD’s;
God has set the world upon them.

The Faith of the Martyred Mother and her Seven Sons
Dr. Malka Z. Simkovich
2 Maccabees 7: https://www.sefaria.org/The_Book_of_Maccabees_II.7.2?lang=en

By invoking Hannah’s poem in 1 Samuel 2, the author of 2 Maccabees 7 is reminding his readers that the biblical heroes of the past have long recognized that our fate lies in the hands of God, that the poor can overnight become rich, and that the barren can overnight conceive. One’s fate can change in a heartbeat, if God wills it. What might seem hopeless today might yield to new life tomorrow. If the author was indeed intending to invoke Jeremiah 15 as well, he would have been also reminding his readers that God controls all of humanity’s destiny; God's actions are not random and arbitrary....
***
Despite its biblical references to suffering or bereft women, the mother in 2 Maccabees 7 is not truly bereft: She has full confidence that one day she will see her sons again after they are all resurrected. The author of 2 Maccabees 7 not only builds on a biblical paradigms, but also develops a new layer based on Second Temple period theology whose seeds are only alluded to in 1 Samuel 2. This new layer offers an answer to how to transcend the pain that God’s people have endured: the Jews will be resurrected in the end of days and the wicked punished. Death is not permanent. This belief is the secret of how the mother and her sons endure their torture.
Dr. Malka Z. Simkovich
https://www.thetorah.com/article/the-faith-of-the-martyred-mother-and-her-seven-sons

בראשית מ״ג:י״ד

(יד) וְאֵ֣ל שַׁדַּ֗י יִתֵּ֨ן לָכֶ֤ם רַחֲמִים֙ לִפְנֵ֣י הָאִ֔ישׁ וְשִׁלַּ֥ח לָכֶ֛ם אֶת־אֲחִיכֶ֥ם אַחֵ֖ר וְאֶת־בִּנְיָמִ֑ין וַאֲנִ֕י כַּאֲשֶׁ֥ר שָׁכֹ֖לְתִּי שָׁכָֽלְתִּי׃

Genesis 43:14

(14) And may El Shaddai dispose the man to mercy toward you, that he may release to you your other brother, as well as Benjamin. As for me, if I am to be bereaved, I shall be bereaved.”

בראשית רבה צ״ב:ג׳

רַבִּי יַאשְׁיָה בֶּן לֵוִי פָּתַר קְרָא בַּגָּלֻיּוֹת (בראשית מג, יד): וְאֵל שַׁדַּי יִתֵּן לָכֶם רַחֲמִים, (תהלים קו, מו): וַיִּתֵּן אוֹתָם לְרַחֲמִים, (בראשית מג, יד): לִפְנֵי הָאִישׁ, הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (שמות טו, ג): ה' אִישׁ מִלְחָמָה ה' שְׁמוֹ. (בראשית מג, יד): וְשִׁלַּח לָכֶם אֶת אֲחִיכֶם, אֵלּוּ עֲשֶׂרֶת הַשְּׁבָטִים. (בראשית מג, יד): אַחֵר וְאֶת בִּנְיָמִין, זֶה שֵׁבֶט יְהוּדָה וּבִנְיָמִין. (בראשית מג, יד): וַאֲנִי כַּאֲשֶׁר שָׁכֹלְתִּי, בְּחֻרְבַּן רִאשׁוֹן, (בראשית מג, יד): שָׁכָלְתִּי, בְּחֻרְבַּן שֵׁנִי. כַּאֲשֶׁר שָׁכֹלְתִּי, בְּחֻרְבָּן רִאשׁוֹן וּבַשֵּׁנִי, לֹא אֶשְׁכַּל עוֹד. דָּבָר אַחֵר, וְאֵל שַׁדַּי יִתֵּן לָכֶם רַחֲמִים לִפְנֵי הָאִישׁ, זֶה הַשִּׁלְטוֹן. וְשִׁלַּח לָכֶם אֶת אֲחִיכֶם, זֶה יוֹסֵף. אַחֵר, זֶה שִׁמְעוֹן. וְאֶת בִּנְיָמִין, כְּמַשְׁמָעוֹ. וַאֲנִי כַּאֲשֶׁר שָׁכֹלְתִּי, בְּיוֹסֵף. שָׁכָלְתִּי, בְּשִׁמְעוֹן, לֹא אֶשְׁכַּל עוֹד.

Bereshit Rabbah 92:3

Rabbi Yashya ben Levi interpreted the verse regarding the exiles: “And may God Almighty grant you mercy” – “He caused them to be pitied” (Psalms 106:46). “Before the man” – the Holy One blessed be He, as it is stated: “The Lord is a Man of war, the Lord is His name” (Exodus 15:3). “And he will send with you your…brother” – these are the Ten Tribes. “Other…and Benjamin” – this is the tribe of Judah and Benjamin. “And me, as I am bereaved” – in the first destruction, “I am bereaved” – in the second destruction. “And me, as I am bereaved” – in the first and second destructions; I will not be bereaved again.
Another matter, “and may God Almighty grant you mercy before the man” – this is the ruler. “And he will send with you your…brother” – this is Joseph; “other” – this is Simeon; “and Benjamin” – in its plain sense. “And me, as I am bereaved” regarding Joseph, [and] “I am bereaved,” regarding Simeon, I will not be bereaved again.