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Tisha B'av 5782/July 26th, 2023
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Rachel Guides Us in the Labor of Grief Tisha B'av 5782/July 26th, 2023
Motherhood Interrupted: Rachel's Suffering
(טז) וַיִּסְעוּ֙ מִבֵּ֣ית אֵ֔ל וַֽיְהִי־ע֥וֹד כִּבְרַת־הָאָ֖רֶץ לָב֣וֹא אֶפְרָ֑תָה וַתֵּ֥לֶד רָחֵ֖ל וַתְּקַ֥שׁ בְּלִדְתָּֽהּ׃ (יז) וַיְהִ֥י בְהַקְשֹׁתָ֖הּ בְּלִדְתָּ֑הּ וַתֹּ֨אמֶר לָ֤הּ הַמְיַלֶּ֙דֶת֙ אַל־תִּ֣ירְאִ֔י כִּֽי־גַם־זֶ֥ה לָ֖ךְ בֵּֽן׃ (יח) וַיְהִ֞י בְּצֵ֤את נַפְשָׁהּ֙ כִּ֣י מֵ֔תָה וַתִּקְרָ֥א שְׁמ֖וֹ בֶּן־אוֹנִ֑י וְאָבִ֖יו קָֽרָא־ל֥וֹ בִנְיָמִֽין׃ (יט) וַתָּ֖מׇת רָחֵ֑ל וַתִּקָּבֵר֙ בְּדֶ֣רֶךְ אֶפְרָ֔תָה הִ֖וא בֵּ֥ית לָֽחֶם׃ (כ) וַיַּצֵּ֧ב יַעֲקֹ֛ב מַצֵּבָ֖ה עַל־קְבֻרָתָ֑הּ הִ֛וא מַצֶּ֥בֶת קְבֻֽרַת־רָחֵ֖ל עַד־הַיּֽוֹם׃
(16) They set out from Bethel; but when they were still some distance short of Ephrath, Rachel was in childbirth, and she had hard labor. (17) When her labor was at its hardest, the midwife said to her, “Have no fear, for it is another boy for you.” (18) But as she breathed her last—for she was dying—she named him Ben-oni;*Ben-oni Understood as “son of my suffering (or, strength).” but his father called him Benjamin.*Benjamin I.e., “son of the right hand,” or “son of the south.” (19) Thus Rachel died. She was buried on the road to Ephrath—now Bethlehem. (20) Over her grave Jacob set up a pillar; it is the pillar at Rachel’s grave to this day.
Rachel Pleads for Her Children

וַתָּמָת רָחֵל וַתִּקָּבֵר בְּדֶרֶךְ אֶפְרָת, מָה רָאָה אָבִינוּ יַעֲקֹב לִקְבֹּר אֶת רָחֵל בְּדֶרֶךְ אֶפְרָת, אֶלָּא צָפָה יַעֲקֹב אָבִינוּ שֶׁהַגָּלֻיּוֹת עֲתִידוֹת לַעֲבֹר שָׁם, לְפִיכָךְ קְבָרָהּ שָׁם כְּדֵי שֶׁתְּהֵא מְבַקֶּשֶׁת עֲלֵיהֶם רַחֲמִים, הֲדָא הוּא דִכְתִיב (ירמיה לא, יד): קוֹל בְּרָמָה נִשְׁמָע נְהִי בְּכִי תַמְרוּרִים רָחֵל מְבַכָּה עַל בָּנֶיהָ.

Why did Jacob bury Rachel on the way to Ephrat? He foresaw that the exiles would pass by there, and thus, he buried her there so that she could please for mercy for them. This is what it says, “Rachel is weeping for her children…”

Rachel's Cry is Heard

(טו) כֹּ֣ה ׀ אָמַ֣ר יקוק ק֣וֹל בְּרָמָ֤ה נִשְׁמָע֙ נְהִי֙ בְּכִ֣י תַמְרוּרִ֔ים רָחֵ֖ל מְבַכָּ֣ה עַל־בָּנֶ֑יהָ מֵאֲנָ֛ה לְהִנָּחֵ֥ם עַל־בָּנֶ֖יהָ כִּ֥י אֵינֶֽנּוּ׃ {ס} (טז) כֹּ֣ה ׀ אָמַ֣ר יקוק מִנְעִ֤י קוֹלֵךְ֙ מִבֶּ֔כִי וְעֵינַ֖יִךְ מִדִּמְעָ֑ה כִּי֩ יֵ֨שׁ שָׂכָ֤ר לִפְעֻלָּתֵךְ֙ נְאֻם־יקוק וְשָׁ֖בוּ מֵאֶ֥רֶץ אוֹיֵֽב׃ (יז) וְיֵשׁ־תִּקְוָ֥ה לְאַחֲרִיתֵ֖ךְ נְאֻם־יקוק וְשָׁ֥בוּ בָנִ֖ים לִגְבוּלָֽם׃

(15) Thus said GOD:
A cry is heard in Ramahiin Ramah Or “on a height.”
Wailing, bitter weeping—
Rachel weeping for her children.
She refuses to be comforted
For her children, who are gone.
(16) Thus said GOD:
Restrain your voice from weeping,
Your eyes from shedding tears;
For there is a reward for your labor
—declares GOD:
They shall return from the enemy’s land.
(17) And there is hope for your future
—declares GOD:
Your children shall return to their country.

באותה שעה קפצה רחל אמנו לפני הקדוש ברוך הוא ואמרה

רבש"ע גלוי לפניך שיעקב עבדך אהבני אהבה יתירה, ועבד בשבילי לאבא שבע שנים, וכשהשלימו אותן שבע שנים, והגיע זמן נשואי לבעלי, יעץ אבי להחליפני לבעלי בשביל אחותי, והוקשה עלי הדבר עד מאד, כי נודעה לי העצה, והודעתי לבעלי ומסרתי לו סימן שיכיר ביני ובין אחותי, כדי שלא יוכל אבי להחליפני, ולאחר כן נחמתי בעצמי וסבלתי את תאותי, ורחמתי על אחותי שלא תצא לחרפה

ולערב חלפו אחותי לבעלי בשבילי, ומסרתי לאחותי כל הסימנין שמסרתי לבעלי, כדי שיהא סבור שהיא רחל, ולא עוד אלא שנכנסתי תחת המטה שהיה שוכב עם אחותי והיה מדבר עמה והיא שותקת, ואני משיבתו על כל דבר ודבר, כדי שלא יכיר לקול אחותי, וגמלתי חסד עמה, ולא קנאתי בה, ולא הוצאתיה לחרפה

מה אני שאני בשר ודם עפר ואפר לא קנאתי לצרה שלי ולא הוצאתיה לבושה ולחרפה, ואתה מלך חי וקיים רחמן, מפני מה קנאת לע"ז שאין בה ממש והגלית בני, ונהרגו בחרב, ועשו אויבים בם כרצונם,

מיד נתגללו רחמיו של הקדוש ברוך הוא ואמר בשבילך רחל אני מחזיר את ישראל למקומן, הה"ד כה אמר יקוק קול ברמה נשמע....

Rachel's Intervention

At that point Rachel our mother jumped in front of the One Blessed be He, saying:

Lord of the Universe, it is known to you that Jacob your servant loved me very much and toiled for me for seven years in my father’s house and that when these seven years were complete my father planned to substitute my sister for me as a wife. I knew his plan and therefore was cast into a dilemma. I informed my husband [of my father’s plot] and gave him a sign to distinguish between me and my sister. [17] But later I had a change of heart. I suppressed my desire [for Jacob] and conceived pity for my sister’s shame.

In the evening, when my sister was substituted for myself, I disclosed to my sister the signs I had given to my husband so that he would believe her to be me. I even crawled under their bed. When he talked to her she maintained her silence while I answered him lest he recognized her voice. I did her a kindness. Nor was I envious of her nor did I expose her to shame.

“And if I, a mere mortal, dust and ashes, overcame my envy and did not shame my sister, why should You, the merciful King, be jealous of idolatry that has no substance and exile my children to be put to death by the sword and to become a prey to their enemies?”

And immediately the mercy of the Lord was stirred and He said: For you, Rachel, I will restore Israel to her place. For it was said: “A voice is heard in Ramah...” (Jer 31:15–17).

Lamentations Rabbah: Proem 24

From the Place We are Right

by Yehudah Amichai

From the place where we are right
Flowers will never grow
In the spring.

The place where we are right
Is hard and trampled
Like a yard.

But doubts and loves
Dig up the world
Like a mole, a plow.
And a whisper will be heard in the place
Where the ruined
House once stood


Yehuda Amichai (1924 - 2000) was an Israeli poet. He was born in Germany, then immigrated with his family to Palestine in 1936. He fought in the Israeli War of Independence as a young man, but became an advocate of peace and reconciliation in the region, working with Palestinian writers.