Toldot - Rebecca the Trickster

Rabbi Shai Held - Chayei Sarah 2014
Why does Rebekah not speak to Isaac? R. Naftali Tzvi Yehudah Berlin (Netziv, 1816-1893) suggests that their lack of communication is rooted in the fact that Rebekah holds Isaac in awe (Ha'amek Davar to Genesis 24:64-65), but it seems more likely that the opposite is the case: Rebekah does not speak to Isaac because she has lost all respect for him. Perhaps his passivity and weakness, coupled with his stubbornly superficial reasons for preferring Esau over God's chosen Jacob, have alienated her. A woman in awe of her husband does not play him for a fool (27:5-17); a woman who thinks little of her husband just might.

Cold Case: Restoring Rebekah, Intrigue in Genesis 27 2016
by David J. Zucker
Isaac does not consult with Rebekah, asking her, what should we do? Rebekah does not make any overt suggestions to her husband. Isaac on his own initiative does exactly what Rebekah had advised Jacob: leave your home and travel off to visit your uncle. Once again this is a couple that thinks alike, acts alike, and works as a team. When Isaac sends Jacob away, he blesses him and asks God to bless this son as well (Gen. 28:2-3). Indeed, in the next verse Isaac repeats the request that God should bless Jacob. This is hardly the reaction of a man who feels angry or disappointed that he has been duped or deceived in the dark. Isaac displays no animosity toward Jacob, and certainly no hostility toward Rebekah. Isaac agrees with Rebekah’s advice to their son and he sends Jacob off with multiple blessings. Clearly he does not feel betrayed by Rebekah, nor does he feel that she has acted counter to his wishes. Isaac knows what Rebekah wants for Jacob, she does not have to spell it out for him. He knows what she wants because it is their plan, not hers alone.

-Dr. Tikva Frymer-Kensky, Reading the Women of the Bible
The story never tells us that Rivka must use deception because she is powerless, and later readers have often accused her of improper and immoral behavior. But the biblical world valued cunning in the underdog. Only the powerful value honesty at all costs. The powerless know that trickery may save their lives.

-Dr. Tikva Frymer-Kensky, Reading the Women of the Bible
Isaac, however, is another story. Talking to him about the danger to Jacob would bring up the topic of the trickery. It might anger Isaac. Even if it did not, Isaac might not wish to send Jacob away. He might wish to resolve the issue between his sons by discussing matters with them, or even by sending Esau to one of his in-laws. Ir else he might send Jacob to Abimelech king of Gerar, with whom he had treaty relations, or to his uncle Ishmael. Both would keep him safe, and both are much closer than Haran. Isaac, the only patriarch never to leave the land of Canaan, might not think to send his son back to Mesopotamia. But Rivka wants to get Jacob to Haran. She therefore brings up the subject of Esau's wives, who, the narrator told us just before Isaac announced his desire to bestow the blessing, were "bitterness for Isaac and Rivka (Gen 26:35). Like other petitioners in the Bible, she speaks forcefully, using a guilt producing rhetoric. But in this death-invoking hyperbole is a truth: the life of a mother involves assuring the life of her children. Rivka, moreover, has devoted her life to the promise. To her, the future of her son is bound up with the promise The promise brought Abraham from Mesopotamoia, and her after him. Rivka wants her own successor to make the same journey. Through her initiative, Isaac duplicates Abraham's charge that his son should not marry a local woman, and repeats the promise that God gave him. In this way, Rivka assures that Jacob's future will imitate Isaac's and that the girl he marries will be like her.