(16) On the third day, as morning dawned, there was thunder, and lightning, and a dense cloud upon the mountain, and a very loud blast of the horn; and all the people who were in the camp trembled. (17) Moses led the people out of the camp toward God, and they took their places at the foot of the mountain. (18) Now Mount Sinai was all in smoke, for the Eternal had come down upon it in fire; the smoke rose like the smoke of a kiln, and the whole mountain trembled violently. (19) The blare of the shofar grew louder and louder. As Moses spoke, God answered him in thunder. (20) The Eternal came down upon Mount Sinai, on the top of the mountain, and the Eternal called Moses to the top of the mountain and Moses went up.
"and they stood at the lowermost part of the mount” (Exodus 19:17). Rav Avdimi bar Chama bar Chasa said: this teaches that the Holy Blessed One overturned the mountain above them like a vat, and said to them: If you accept the Torah, good, and if not, there will be your burial. Rav Acha bar Ya’akov said: From here there is a substantial caveat to the obligation to fulfil the Torah. Rava said: Even so, they again accepted it in the time of Ahasuerus, as it is written: “The Jews ordained, and took upon them, and upon their seed, and upon all such as joined themselves unto them” (Esther 9:27), and he taught: The Jews ordained what they had already taken upon themselves at Sinai.
The Israelites did not accept the Torah until the Holy Blessed One arched the mountain over them like a vat, as it is said: And they stood beneath the mountain (Exod. 19:17). Rav Dimi the son of Chama stated that the Holy Blessed One told Israel: If you accept the Torah, good; but if not, your grave will be there. If you should say that God arched the mountain over them because of the Written Law, isn’t it true that as soon as God said to them, “Will you accept the Torah?” they all responded, “We will do and hear,” because the Written Law was brief and required no striving and suffering, but rather God threatened them because of the Oral Law. After all, it contains the detailed explanations of the commandments, both simple and difficult, and it is as severe as death, and as jealous as Sheol. One does not study the Oral Law unless one loves the Holy Blessed One with all their heart, with all their soul, and with all their might, as it is said: And thou shalt love the Eternal thy God with all thy heart, with all thy soul, and with all thy might (Deut. 6:5).
(כז) ויתיצבו בתחתית ההר, מלמד שכפה עליהן הר כגיגית. פירוש, שהראה להם כבוד ד' בהקיץ ובהתגלות נפלאה, עד כי ממש בטלה בחירתם הטבעיי ויצאה נשמתם מהשגת כבוד ד', והיו מוכרחים כמלאכים בלא הבדל, וראו כי כל הנבראים תלוי רק בקבלת התורה.
“And they stood at the foot of the mountain” – this teaches that God held the mountain above them like a vat. This means, that God showed them the glory of the divine in revealed and wondrous ways, up to the point where their natural free choice was literally removed, and their souls departed from exposure to the glory of God. They were forced, like angels, without the ability to discern, as they saw with complete clarity that all of creation is dependent on the Torah.
-Dena Weiss, Mechon Hadar, Beshallach 2018
The final mishnah in Ta’anit compares Matan Torah, the giving of the Torah, to our wedding to God:
משנה תענית ד:ח
צאנה וראינה בנות ציון במלך שלמה בעטרה שעיטרה לו אימו ביום חתונתו וביום שמחת ליבו (שיר השירים ג:יא): "ביום חתונתו", זה מתן תורה; "וביום שמחת ליבו", זה בניין בית המקדש.
Mishnah Ta’anit 4:8
“Go forth, daughters of Zion, and gaze on King Sh’lomo with the crown with which his mother has crowned him on the day of his wedding and on the day of the joy of his heart ” (Shir HaShirim 3:11). “On the day of his wedding” is the giving of the Torah. “On the day of the joy of his heart” is the building of the Temple.
But according to the Talmud, our wedding with God was not an exclusively romantic affair:
תלמוד בבלי שבת פח.
ויתיצבו בתחתית ההר (שמות יט). א"ר אבדימי בר חמא בר חסא- מלמד שכפה הקב"ה עליהם את ההר כגיגית ואמר להם אם אתם מקבלים התורה מוטב- ואם לאו שם תהא קבורתכם.
Talmud Bavli Shabbat 88a
“They stood at the bottom of the mountain” [lit. underneath the mountain]. R. Avdimi b. Hama bar Hasa said—This teaches that God overturned the mountain like a barrel and said to them, “If you accept the Torah, good; and if not, this will be your grave.”
In the wedding that R. Avdimi describes, the huppah is not beautiful and protective, woven with the beautiful tapestries described in the Song of Songs. The huppah was a mountain ripped from the earth, flipped over, and held like a barrel over our heads. God does not say, “I love you unconditionally.” Instead God says, “Accept My conditions, or I will kill you.” These two moments of commitment, the splitting of the Reed Sea and the giving of the Torah, could have been imagined as smooth, beautiful, and loving, but they are not. They could have been characterized by joy and excitement, but instead are described as being dominated by fear and anger and the threat of annihilation.
These moments are presented in this way because this is the nature of romantic commitment. If I ask you to marry me, but you say “no,” we don’t usually continue on as if nothing has changed. It is because the stakes are so high that the feeling on the other side of strong, fierce love is not apathy or a neutral affection; it is anger, and it is fear. God’s suspending the mountain over our heads is not a description of an arbitrary threat that God makes, but rather an expression of the reality of this kind of proposal. If we choose to reject God at the moment that He asks us to be with Him, God will not stay with us. That is the end of the relationship. Similarly, when God pulls back the waters of the sea, inviting us to walk through the dry land and into a committed relationship with God, there is a lot of hope, but also a lot of vulnerability and fear. If we choose to walk through the walls of water, good. The water will stay suspended; we will remain safe. However, if we choose to reject God, the walls will crash around us and bury us in a watery grave. We will be consumed by God’s disappointment and fury.