(17) You shall not hate your sibling in your heart. Reprove your kinsman but incur no guilt because of them. (18) You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against your countrymen. Love your neighbor as yourself: I am the LORD.
Posted on Black Girl Dangerous December 18, 2013 by editors
by Ngọc Loan Trần
Most of us know the drill. Someone says something that supports the oppression of another community, the red flags pop up and someone swoops in to call them out.
But what happens when that someone is a person we know — and love? What happens when we ourselves are that someone?
How do we do this in our own lives?
Is this process of rebuke and love accessible to us?
Is it effective?
Although tokhachah (moral guidance and reproof) is extremely important, and it is incumbent upon every Jew to reprove their fellow Jew when they see them acting incorrectly, as it is written (Leviticus 19:17), “You shall surely reprove your fellow,” nevertheless, not everyone is fit to offer moral guidance. As Rabbi Akiva said: I doubt if there is anyone in this generation who is capable of giving reproof (Arakhin 16b). And if Rabbi Akiva said this in his era, then it is all the more so now, in this current era.
What makes someone fitting to offer moral guidance?
What limitations should there be on the Torah demand that we reprove our neighbors?
And behold, one who hates their neighbor transgresses a negative commandment and one who loves them, fulfills a positive commandment... And the verse states, "You shall not hate your sibling in your heart" in their doing to you that which is not like your will; but rather, rebuke them [by saying], "Why did you do like this to me." [Hence the meaning of] "And you shall not carry sin for them" [is] to cover up your hatred for them in your heart and not to tell them. As in your rebuking him, they will make amends with you or repent and admit their sin, and it will be atoned for them. And afterwards it warns that you not take revenge from them and not bear a grudge in your heart [about] what they did to you. As it is likely that you will not hate them but you will remember the sin in your heart. And therefore it warns you that one erases the crime and sin of one's sibling from their heart. And afterwards it commands them, "and you shall love your neighbor as yourself." The phrase "love your neighbor as yourself" is an exaggeration, since the heart of a person will not accept that they love their fellow as they love themselves. Moreover, Rabbi Akiva has already taught (Bava Metzia 62), "Your life comes before the life of your fellow." Rather, the Torah here enjoins us that one should love their neighbor with every item with which one loves themselves, [to receive] every benefit [that one wishes upon themselves].
Above all the ethic of holiness tells us that every human being is made in the image and likeness of God. God made each of us in love. Therefore, if we seek to imitate God – “Be holy because I, the Lord your God, am holy” – we too must love humanity, and not in the abstract but in the concrete form of the neighbour and the stranger. The ethic of holiness is based on the vision of creation-as-God’s-work-of-love. This vision sees all human beings – ourselves, our neighbour and the stranger – as in the image of God, and that is why we are to love our neighbour and the stranger as ourself.
Is this mitzvah, as describe by Ramban and Rabbi Sacks a communal obligation or a personal one? Why?
Contention makes it is impossible to speak. For in the main speech stems from peace, as it is written, “I will now speak peace” (Psalms 122:8). It is therefore necessary for each person, prior to praying, to accept upon themselves the positive commandment to “Love your neighbor as [you love] yourself” (Leviticus 19:18), so that as a result of there being love and peace, one is then able to speak in prayer.